Author: Chris Johnson

Women and mental health

Cleo: Welcome back in your health news this morning. A women’s history edition here. Research shows women are the queens of multitasking, but many of us are fighting some burn out, chronic fatigue, depression and anxiety without addressing it. Joining us right now is Tori Dixon, a counselor and the owner of Graceful Journey Counseling. Good morning to you, Tory.

Tori: Good morning, Cleo. How are you this morning?

Cleo: I’m doing well. Glad to have you here. Uh Tell us more about this burn out and why women really struggle to deal with.

Tori: I think one of the biggest parts you mentioned it is that multitasking that we tend to do more often than not. And the best way that we can handle that is by making sure we set boundaries with ourselves. And that is we have a clear understanding of both our capacity and our capability. That’s how much we can do. And that’s actually what we can do.

And oftentimes when we mix those two things up, we don’t have the capacity to do something. It then goes into us feeling as if we’re incapable of doing it and what we need just need to do is slow down a little bit, um, hone in on the things that we do well, and we do and we should do those things more often.

Cleo: And sometimes it, it’s easier said than done. Let’s talk about emotional equity. Tory. What does that really mean? And then how do we invest in ourselves?

Tori: Emotional equity is basically, where are you putting your emotional energy? How much of your emotional space and your mental health space? Are you putting into one task versus another?

Now, this is often going to require us to make sure that we’re doing a really good risk/reward analysis of our emotions, right?

How much are we putting in places where we’re actually getting a benefit from it? So that not only are we better for ourselves, but we’re also better for the people that are around us. Oftentimes we see that our emotions equity is best placed when we are taking care of other people. But I always say there is no substitute for taking care of yourself. You cannot take care of other people in some way to substitute your responsibility to look after your own well-being.

Cleo: Oh, wow. Yes, Tori, you know, research shows that a lot of women right now we’re multitasking, of course, and we’re doing a lot of things right now and we may not be in the spot that we always dreamed of ourselves to be. How do we nurture that dream?

Tori: The first thing I want to tell us as women is, you need to be intentional first. You have to be intentional with your time. Listen, all we have right now is now this very moment. So you have a responsibility to cultivate the life that you want right now. In this moment. The problem is that if we look too far ahead, we run into anxiety and if we spend too much time on the past, we end up running into depression,

Cleo: And, and how do we deal with, I guess, stretching ourselves too thin and maybe learning to say no to something and not feeling bad about it?

Tori: You know, um one of my, one of the greatest artists is Chaka Khan, right? She told us that we were every woman and it was all in us and everything that we wanted, we could do it naturally and guess what? That’s not really true, right? We are not every woman. We are just the women that we are. And the best way that we can show up in our lives is to show up in your own life to maybe resist comparison, resist looking at other people’s lives and wishing and hoping that that was your life. The best thing you can do is quiet the noise, get within and be your own woman. Stay in your lane and do what you do best.

Cleo: Ok, I’m loving that too, quiet the noise. Stay in your Lane and do not compare. Ok, good reminders this morning. Tori let’s talk about work life balance before we go here because that’s really different for every woman. and I don’t really think we should judge how women define that for themselves.

Tori: We certainly should not. I think especially when we’re raising Children. That seems to be the most competitive thing that’s happening right now. Like how well are you as a mom? And what is, what does this look like? And what does that look like?

The one thing that I always say, Cleo is that we have a responsibility to have a life work balance instead of a work life balance. The aforementioned gives us an opportunity to prioritize our lives.

First, we should not be squeezing the depth and the breadth of our lives into work schedules. We should be cultivating and creating lives for which our work can fit well into it. That way, we find more purpose in the work that we do again. That way we are being better stewards over our emotional energy and we are prioritizing the things that work best for us, our families and our homes, they need to be safe havens, they need to be places where we can come to as a refuge. And when we don’t have enough time to create those spaces, we end up running out of energy and we can’t show up as our better selves in our work spaces.

So I think the best way that you can um advance in your career or if you want to be a business person, the best way that you can do that is to cultivate a life that allows your work to fit within a space that is um emotionally well for you.

Cleo: Those are excellent strategies. Let’s talk about emotional equity. What does it mean, and why is it important?

Tory: Emotional equity refers to the fair distribution of emotional labor and responsibilities. It’s important because when one person, often a woman, is disproportionately responsible for emotional tasks, it can lead to burnout and resentment. Achieving emotional equity involves:

1. Shared Responsibilities: Ensuring that all members of a household or team share in the emotional labor.
2. Open Communication: Having open and honest conversations about feelings and responsibilities.
3. Recognition and Appreciation: Acknowledging and valuing the emotional labor that is being done.
4. Supportive Policies: Implementing policies that support emotional well-being, such as flexible work hours and mental health days.

Cleo: Well, Amen. Amen. Uh Tori Dixon, owner of Graceful Journey Counseling. Thank you so much uh for joining us again this morning. We’ll be sure to put your information on our website at WFAA.com.

Such a pleasure to have you.

Tori: Thank you Cleo and Happy Women’s History Month to you.

Cleo: Same to you.